Before same-sex marriage was legalized in the UK, same-sex couples gained legal recognition for their relationships under the Civil Partnership Act. Now that these couples can be legally married, they can still opt for a civil partnership instead. But here’s the rub: Different-sex couples can’t. All they can do is either marry or carry on with few legal protections, even if they are cohabiting.
Unmarried Equality members need no explanation for the desire for an alternative to marriage, even for different-sex couples who have always had the doors to marriage open to them. But it can be perplexing to others who may be reading this, so here’s how the group Equal Civil Partnerships explains it:
“Many people would like to have their partnerships legally recognized, but want to avoid the expectations, pressures, and traditions surrounding marriage and have the choice to enter into a more modern form of legal union.” High on the list of unwanted marital baggage is “patriarchal baggage.”
There are few legal differences between marriages and civil partnerships in the UK. For example, both provide the same rights with regard to taxes, inheritance, and pensions. There are some quirky components of legal marriage in the UK. For example, “in the ceremony partners have to say the words ‘I take you to be my wife…I take you to be my husband.’” For many couples who want to be legally protected without marrying, though, the principles are more important than the quirks. Other different-sex couples have their own reasons for not wanting to marry, such as anticipated expenses or bad personal experiences.
Equal Civil Partnerships compiled some statistics and facts worth noting:
- Among today’s unmarried different-sex couples in the UK, 20% would prefer a civil partnership to marriage or cohabitation
- Since same-sex marriage was legalized in the UK, 13% of same-sex couples in civil partnerships got married
- Civil partnerships are more stable than marriages: “A marriage formed in 2005 had a 5.5% chance of ending in divorce by 2010 whereas a civil partnership had a 2.5% chance.”
- Other countries that offer different-sex civil partnerships include:
- Australia
- Belgium
- Brazil
- Finland
- France
- The Netherlands
- New Zealand
- Portugal
- South Africa
- Uruguay
Charles Keidan and Rebecca Steinfeld have been pursuing the legalization of civil partnerships for different-sex couples, and just this week (May 14, 2018), their case made it all the way to the Supreme Court of the UK. A decision is expected in a few months.
In the U.S., something different happened, according to FindLaw. Some states had civil partnerships on the books before same-sex marriage was legalized: Colorado, Delaware, Hawaii, Illinois, New Jersey, and Rhode Island. But once same-sex marriage became the law of the land, Delaware and Rhode Island considered marriage a replacement for civil unions.
The bigger-picture question is whether anyone should have to be any kind of couple to have access to basic benefits and protections. (My answer: Of course not.) The Equal Civil Partnership group is focused solely on extending civil unions to different-sex couples. They specify that they are uninterested in addressing the issue of whether siblings should qualify. The rights of solo singles are not mentioned.
[Notes: (1) The opinions expressed here do not represent the official positions of Unmarried Equality. (2) The comment option on the UE website has been invaded by spammers, so I have disabled comments for now. I’ll post all these blog posts at the UE Facebook page; please join our discussions there. (3) For links to previous columns, click here.]
About the Author: Bella DePaulo (PhD, Harvard), a long-time member of Unmarried Equality, is the author of Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After and How We Live Now: Redefining Home and Family in the 21st Century, among other books. She writes the “Living Single” blog for Psychology Today and the “Single at Heart” blog for Psych Central. Visit her website at www.BellaDePaulo.com and take a look at her TEDx talk, “What no one ever told you about people who are single.”
About Bella DePaulo
