What’s at Issue
From USA Today:
“Most people want to get married someday, and most do. That’s not at issue,” says Nicky Grist of the Brooklyn-based Alternatives to Marriage Project, a non-profit advocate for the rights of the unmarried.
She and others have organized an ad hoc coalition that will ask the Obama administration to stop using anti-poverty money for marriage promotion.
“What’s at issue is really two things, from our perspective,” she says. “Should government tell people when to get married? And should government and society privilege marriage over all other relationships? Our answer to both those questions is no.”
What do YOU think about federally funded marriage advertisements? How do you think “the administration [should] “make choices based on shrinking budgets and a worsening economy?”
February 18th, 2009 at 1:43 pm
Words cannot describe the way I felt when I read the article in USA Today this morning. I cannot even believe it and I want to do something about it. The last thing I need is advice from the government on marriage. Tax payers should not be paying for this type of advertising. It is very disturbing.
February 18th, 2009 at 7:55 pm
Ugh! I hadn’t seen the USA Today article but my first thought when I saw this post in my reader was how odd it seems for someone from Alternatives to Marriage to be perpetuating the idea that “most people want to get married someday”. I mean, I think I understand the point of the quote in the context of the article but as someone who hates it when others assume that since I’m single, I must be dying to get married, I was annoyed. But then my annoyance is really with the bigger issue: people who see marriage as the only legitimate form for committed, long-term relationships. The one thing in the USA Today article that I wholeheartedly agree with is the guy who points out that although the trend is there, whether or not it’s a *problem* is a different question. What’s particularly lame is that reference to the ‘research’ on the benefits of ‘marriage’ – the writer clearly hasn’t read Bella DePaulo! Take away those supposed benefits and even the weak argument about how this is analogous to seatbelt laws becomes ridiculous.
February 19th, 2009 at 12:46 pm
I am a very happily unmarried 37 year old man and I avoid marriage not because I am afraid of commitment or that there is something wrong with me, as many would have you and I think, but because I just have never seen what the fuss is all about. There is a big problem in this country with what I call “high and mightyism.” Whenever someone sees a high horse in the street they want to get on it and tell everyone what to do and how immoral they are if they don’t do it. That is the real motivation behind things like this marriage promotion and the drug war (a truly colossal waste of money) that distort facts, take taxpayer funds and get a bunch of nosy self righteous people the warm and fuzzies inside all in the name of “The good of society.”
What a joke. I just can’t believe that more people don’t see through it. But then again, the reason that we have such a problem in this country with these things is that folks just seem to have a hard time thinking for themselves.
February 19th, 2009 at 2:50 pm
Instead of promoting marriage, which is essentially a package deal of questionable merit, the government would do better promoting healthy relationships, regardless of their configuration. Even when one is single, marriage is not always possible.
But that said, the government has no business whatsoever getting involved in any way with its citizens’ personal relationships. Contrary to what Mr Haskins from the article says, promoting marriage is not the same as promoting seat belts or promoting drug-free living. If you do drugs, you could die. If you don’t wear a seat belt and you have an accident, you could die. If you don’t get married, you don’t die. Promoting marriage is about social control, not the public good. It’s about rewarding some citizens at the expense of others.
If the government was truly interested in performing a public service, they’d use that HHS money to lower the national debt.
February 19th, 2009 at 4:23 pm
The only thing that makes me “unhappily married” is the pressure I get from our government and society at large that only married people are happy.
February 19th, 2009 at 11:07 pm
Sadly, this story is making the rounds in the media now. MSNBC has picked it up, too.
If you don’t like what the federal government spends our money on, email you Congressperson and tell them so! If enough of us do this, we might change something.
February 21st, 2009 at 10:28 am
I was disgusted with what I found out when I picked up this edition of USA Today. I ended up writing a semi-lengthy editorial on it, it’s 900 – some words, and most newspapers will only take up to 250. I’ve submitted it to USA Today and my local papers here in Charleston/Huntington WV. Any ideas of other places to go however? It’s currently posted on the blog section of my webcomic – the most recent update at http://rantingraven-guero.tk. it’s listed for sunday under 02/22/09
March 18th, 2009 at 2:15 pm
My only question is, when’s “equality to all” mean just that. Universal Healthcare is a “Need” not just something that could help us a little bit. Everyone could be healthy and Insurance Companies wouldn’t be able to pick and choose. Advertisements should be centered towards Healthy Children. I’m fighting my Ex-Employer, trying to get her to fill out papers on why she fired me (my mother had emergency surgery and I had to take time off so I could take care of her) so my 14 month daughter can go get her 12 month check-up. I’m frustrated and saddened that my Employer chooses whether my daughter goes to the Doctor. My boyfriend Jon and I have been together 3 years, are madly in love and plan to stay happily un-married. He has a great job but can’t get insurance for me or his daughter due to no proof of marriage. The Government needs to realize that all our problems are not solved with Marriage. Problems are resolved by making and sticking to a change.
February 5th, 2010 at 12:05 am
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